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I think teenagers are having sex more often because of the lack of fatherhood. It seems like there was a lot of rebelion in the 60s and a huge target was fathers.

It feels like there has been an increase in value for the young and for women like never before, but it isn't the type of value that seems particularly true to who women and children are. It feels like because women were patronized by society there was a pendulum swing in the opposite direction... you know? Like now all those good things that men do for women are completely scorned because women have rejected men quite a bit. Things like protection, honor, provision. Feminism decided to buck the control they felt by men by attacking men as a whole instead of the control or the abuse or the patronizing itself. Children rebeled not against criticism or harshness or materialism or emotional abandonment...but against the fathers that were acting in these ways. Instead of saying, look how harmful these behaviors are, they said look how harmful these men are.

It can be really hard to tell someone in authority that what they are doing is hurting you. Sometimes it feels like the only thing that you can do is reject the authority. But in doing so, a lot is lost. Men are supposed to be heros and strong fathers and loving, providing, protecting husbands. Those values are often attributed to being henpecked or wimpy or boring now.

Boys growing up without a father looked to what ever role models they could find. Often time action heros are womanizers and lone wolves who don't give a rip about others and make their own rules and yet are idolized.

And while many women are independent, most still deeply care what men think and play right into the hands of an attentive male who lacks character and identity. The women have no fathers to show them how valuable they are and so they look for another male role model to find that from.

No one expects very much from men right now and that is exactly what men become...much, much less than they are capable of. Women have said to men and children have said to fathers, "We don't need you," and so men have gone off to do their own thing. And a lot of that is having sex and not committing. Why have a career if you don't have a wife and children to have it for? Why have a wife if she is just going to try to control you and not value your masculinity? Why have kids only to have them be ungrateful dependents?

If there is no value for what men offer, than why should they offer it? And the trouble is is that regardless of what they do with it, men are still strong, powerful, prone to action and to making things happen. Take away your value for their achievements for good because they miss the mark a little and why should they try to make something of themselves or offer themselves for another?

I mentioned that I am not a feminist thought I am passionate about seeing women succeed in a comment on someone else's site. My reasoning behind this is because I feel like feminism preaches ideas that are not realistic. For some reason there are many current thought trends that are stating that men and women are equal, that it is completely belittling to admit that a woman might greatly benefit from a masculine man, that you can never let down your guard, that you are a dumb girl or a weak girl if you are feminine and sentimental and allow a man to meet needs in your life. If I share what I think about what women really want and need, it is called small-minded or sexist or outdated. Well, I am a very smart, modern girl. I am actually VERY smart. And I think anyone who tries to make a man out of a woman or teaches women to think of men as less than they are is cruel.

I study men and women a lot, especially women and have spent a lot of time trying to gain deep understanding into what a woman is. Women are soft, delicate, feminine...all those things that it is NOT safe to be if the men around you are bad. But when the men are good, it works so well. A woman evokes greatness in a man with her beauty. Men love to give, women love to receive. When it is healthy, it works right, is amazing. When men are cruel, women become defensive, have to resort to survival tactics. And then if they become embittered or if whole waves of thinking are based on survival and the responses to the worst case scenario, then things get ugly and dry and messy.

I agree with feminists that bad behavior from a man is unacceptable and no woman should have to endure it. I disagree when they try to cut men out of the picture all together simply because they have experienced the bad effects of failure. That only causes the problems to escalate.

Take an example from racism, since it is easy to understand. Being very very generic, in this country whites were really mean to blacks. Now, blacks have a choice, to hate back or to not hate back. If black people in our country decided to fight evil with evil then it would have been utter chaos. I thank God for people like MLK who preached peace instead of revenge. Because they have been so gracious and forgiving, a lot of healing has happened and more will come.

In the same way, a lot of women received very demeaning behavior. They were taken advantage of in various ways and were not allowed to reach their full potential as men exercised their strength against women instead of giving it to them and for them. We can respond by hating men or by forgiving. I definitely think things need to change for women but it isn't about taking power away from men to give it to women. It is about empowering both. There is more than enough power for everyone. We just don't believe it and so instead of pursuing our dreams, we try to make sure other people don't hurt us. If men and women are in partnership with one another, than as one grows and strengthens, the other is benefited as well.

I personally don't have any rules about what women can or cannot do or should or should not do. Every one is different. Some should never marry. Some should never enter the work force. I think every individual should be allowed to be true to who they are so long as their heart is good. If a woman wants to work, let her work...but let it not be because she is trying to prove that she won't be repressed or because if she doesn't then she feels worthless....let it be because she actually wants to. If she wants to stay at home and be a wife and mother, let her. LET HER DO WHAT IS IN HER HEART, let her be true to herself without criticism. It is about the individual, not about womankind as a whole when it comes to the outward expression of who she is. To me those issues are secondary, like fruit on a tree. I believe that while almost all trees have roots and a trunk and leaves, they produce different kinds of fruits. While women have many things in common, they express themselves differently and should be appreciated for who they are. An apricot tree and a walnut tree are both great, though neither will ever do exactly what the other one does. In the same way, different women, while similar, are always going to look different. And it is good.

Like roots and trunks, etc, I believe there are fundamental things that all woman possess...such as a need to be loved, the ability to respond well to that love and to give easily and freely if her heart is not wounded, beauty, strength, a desire to be protected, cherished and valued....but not controlled. No woman should have to squish herself to make herself small enough for a man. She needs to wait for a man who is big enough to allow her to be her whole self. I am praying that those men who are stunted in their growth for what ever reason, be it fear, lack of identity or purpose or value, would be all they are supposed to be as well.

Anyway, that is what I think. I think teen sex is a result of a lot of deeper issues.